MARRIAGE IN BAFUT CULTURE
Marriage, as an institution in Bafut, is fundamentally centered on reproduction and procreation. It is regarded by the ancestors as sacred and inviolable. This union between a man and a woman is protected by customs and traditions.
Getting married is considered the norm, while remaining unmarried is viewed as socially unacceptable—a condition often seen as a curse. Polygamy is traditionally the rule, while monogamy is seen as an exception. In many cases, monogamy is interpreted as a sign of extreme poverty or political weakness.
There are seven fundamental stages of marriage among the Bafut people:
Stage One: Betrothal(“Knock-Door”)
Bafut: ŋkòsə Màŋgyὲ
The girl aspiring for marriage introduces her suitor to her parents on an agreed date. This formal introduction initiates the marital journey……. .read more
Stage Two: Refund of Betrothal Drink
Bafut: Ǹtu mɨlù’ù mɨ ŋkosə màŋgyὲ
If the girl expresses no objection to the first stage, the second stage begins. This involves the ritual of returning or accepting the bride-price drink as confirmation of the ongoing marriage process……read more
Stage Three: Visiting Aunts of the Bride at their Homes (Door-To-Door Visits)
Bafut: lyeuh Meunchu Meu Nda Beu Nongseh
If the bride’s extended relatives (especially her father’s siblings) are few, the father will direct the suitor or his representatives to visit them individually at their homes, to inform and seek blessings…….. .read more
Stage Four: Part Payment of Bride Price
Bafut: (Mulu Miboreh) Mɨlù’ù Mî bɔrə̀
The suitor and his representatives meet with the girl’s father and maternal grandfather (called Ta-ma in Bafut) to present a partial payment of the bride price……..read more
Stage Five: Oil for the Women
Bafut: ǹswǒŋ bɨ̀ nɔ̂ŋsə/ mɨghurə mɨ bâŋgyὲ /mɨghurə mɨ wè
This stage signifies the suitor’s official and public declaration of his marriage intentions. It involves offering symbolic items (often oil or other gifts) to the women in the bride’s family…..read more
Stage Six: Solemnisation of Traditional Marriage
Bafut: Nyoh Mangyie Ǹyɔ’ɔ màŋgyὲ
On an arranged date,which must be a Mumitaa (country sunday),the in-laws of the bride and bridegroom massively attend the solemnization of the traditional marriage at the compound of the father of the bride…..read more
Stage Seven: Procession From Bride’s Home to her Marital Home
Bafut: ṁbètə mûŋgèn ὴghԑԑ mfa a mbô ndoò
The traditional songs of praise and honour to the bride continue till the arrival of the bridal train (marriage procession) at the compound of the bridegroom…. read more
Traditional Marriage Rites in the Past and Present
In the past, marriage rites in Bafut could span over two years or more. Men seeking to marry were subjected to heavy demands — including gifts in kind, cash payments, and forced labor on their in-laws’ farms or homes. These exactions, though burdensome, were culturally accepted as proof of commitment and respect.
However, to curb excessive and unreasonable demands from in-laws, the traditional marriage process has since been restructured. What once took years has now been thoughtfully condensed into seven clearly defined stages, making the journey to marriage more accessible and respectful for all parties involved.
Divorce
According to Bafut customs and traditions, marriage is a life union and divorce is an abomination. However… read more